u wish you were aldi's banana chips 🙄
imo milk chocolate does not go with banana chips as well as dark chocolate (however i am also biased because i much prefer dark chocolate always). what's frustrating is they have many other dark-chocolate-covered snacks. they're so close!! if aldi started selling their chips in a 15 oz container like this i would lose my mind
these make me insane. i love them so fucking much. if aldi gets rid of them i will [remembers suicide jokes worsen mental health] befriend a wild mustang
i've been eating tofu forever but haven't posted a review of any of it for some reason. anyway... does what i need it to do, but "extra firm" is a lie imo. falls apart way more easily than any other tofu brand i've tried.
$5 @ walmart | vegan
i am obsessed with these. my only complaint is i can only find them at walmart, which is not my usual grocery store.
edit (2026-07-09): removed one star. these are getting harder to find and are greasier/oilier.
$4 @ kroger | vegan
fine???? honestly i didn't taste much of anything
$4 @ kroger | vegetarian
i think what all these plant sausages are missing is that tight snap when you bite into it.
$4 @ kroger | vegan
i am addicted to this shit. it's lowkey expensive and i can only find it at kroger but man is it good.
edit (2026-07-09): removed one star. they changed the recipe and it's noticably more watery.
$19 @ fresh thyme | vegan
i cannot believe how well this did. everyone (save my obnoxious conservative cousin who kept whining about soy) got a second helping. my grandpa got three. more than one person asked me to bring it again next year. there were no leftovers. one less star bc of the cost and the need to drive to a specialty hippie store.
$2 @ kroger | vegan
seems largely identical to kraft, at least in terms of "vibe" i guess. still upsets my stomach for some reason.
$5 @ kroger | vegan
fairly close to a fast food spicy chicken sandwich patty.
edit (2026-07-09): added one star. i let myself have some leeway one bad, low-energy week a while back and i got a mcdonald's chicken sandwich that i was craving, which i regretted instantly. really upset my stomach (unsurprising), but i also just felt gross and unsatisfied afterward, even though the patty was quite large and filling. got more of these patties instead the following week and had a much better time.
$2 @ meijer | ovo-vegetarian
classic campbell's soup taste. less tomato-y than i thought it would be (a good thing). ate with a few slices of sourdough.
$5 @ kroger | vegan
much much much better than the cheddar slices. i quite liked it as the slice of cheese on a veggie burger. doesn't melt very well when placed directly onto the patty in my experience. regardless i will continue to get these.
$6 @ kroger | vegan
idk what the fuck is up with these but i ate half of one and immediately felt completely full with insane heartburn (?). very strange and kind of painful. the reviews seem generally positive so i have 0 clue why it tried to kill me specifically. i had a similar reaction to the field roast sausage and the main thing these both have in common is fennel. idk. i might be allergic to something lol.
$8 | vegetarian
i no longer get fast food but do allow myself a handful of trips a year to taco bell specifically. this instantly became my new favorite taco bell item. wtf this was so good. immediately went home and tried to recreate it which came out great too.
$6 @ kroger | vegan
excellent. better than "real" mayo imo. even if i wasn't aiming for veg+nism i would still pick this as my mayo of choice. the price difference compared to typical mayo is about $1-2, but it often goes on sale or gets coupons. i love that it comes in a glass jar.
$5 @ kroger | vegan
basically identical to the earth grown veggie burger but it costs a few more dimes and is available more widely.
$7 @ kroger | vegan
tasted... sweet? that is not what sausage is supposed to taste like imo. made me feel bloated and weird.
$5 @ kroger | vegan
eh.
$4 @ aldi | vegan
i think the black bean burgers are objectively better and will appeal to anyone with good taste, but i love these a lot too and crave them often.
edit (2026-07-09): see black bean burger edit.
$4 @ aldi | vegan
this shit is so good for no reason. i regularly recommend these to meat eaters because i think they just taste really good, period.
edit (2026-07-09): as far as i can tell aldi is no longer selling these?? fml
$15 | vegan
fine. you get 8 patties but it's still expensive as hell. as you can probably guess i'm not a fan of plant-based alternatives that are trying to be as close to meat as possible, but i think they have a place.
$3 | vegan
not for me. i don't like the chalky aftertaste. i also really don't like how much water is needed to grow almonds compared to other plant milks.
i don't remember lol | vegetarian
ate this while on a roadtrip pre-diet change. it's fine. i'm glad it's an option. meat lobbyist copium is always funny.